More excellent tech-noir from the Turbo Recordings man, from his new EP 'Conspiracy Vol.2' - which is out now, - get it here!
FNORD
Punk + Olympics = Fuck the Fuck off, yer Fuckin Fuck Faced Fucks
"Lahndan corlling ner nee ner nee ner ner....um...battle....something....er..la la la la la la .... hang on...Ice age...er....hey here we go! This is the bit I like!...I LIVE BY THE RIVVVVVAAAHH! COME ON BRITAIN! YEAAAAAHHHHH! UK! UK! UK!..."
- as performed by Terry Tosspot, 23 yrs, on July 27th 2012, outside the Steroid & Shoespike sportsbar, (formerly the Millenium Arms public house) Soho, London, Hell.
So 'London Calling' in all it's paranoid glory has been chosen to soundtrack the Olympics and win the custom of Johnny Sports-fan. Now cynics like me will snigger & grin widely at the irony of attempting to pimp the whore London by listing it's STD's, but, seriously, did whoever chose this ever listen to the lyrics? Reminds me of when the BBC gormlessly decided to hawk itself by hiring an embarrasment of slebs to grunt along to Lou Reed's smack anthem 'Perfect Day', seemingly on the basis of the title alone (though also possibly cos most at the time knew it from the Trainspotting soundtrack, which, presumably in the BBC hive mind, made it keeeewl, but ought to have given them a pretty big clue as to it's subject matter - whoops). Mind you, the perennially deluded and ignorant glut of middle Englander dipshits & knee jerk nationalists that will doubtless fill our pubs with their charming, virtually wordless renditions of this punk anfum in the next year have ever behaved thus. You've seen this sort of eminently slapable twat waving their little flags and belting out 'Jerusalem' at the Proms for about a century now - the last few embers of empire still just about glowing in their dead, dead eyes - and you just know they are completely unaware of the fact that it's a piss take. 'And did those feet / in ancient times / walk upon England's mountains green?' asks William Blake, rhetorically. The answer is: of course they fucking didn't. Jesus did not go on holiday to Cornwall, just as Lou Reed did not write a song about how he had a nice time with a girl on Tuesday. And I don't imagine Joe Strummer ever lay back and dreamt of a day when he could take satisfaction in soundtracking the pissing away of billions of public pounds on a glorified sports day.
If you're a sports fan, get ready to continue enjoying the war on art you've been conducting since launching your playground 'Wedgies For Weirdos' campaign. If you are or were a Clash fan, get ready to enjoy the experience of coming to loathe one of your favourite songs. Increasingly, I hope the Mayans were right about next year.
In summary: Facepalm
- as performed by Terry Tosspot, 23 yrs, on July 27th 2012, outside the Steroid & Shoespike sportsbar, (formerly the Millenium Arms public house) Soho, London, Hell.
So 'London Calling' in all it's paranoid glory has been chosen to soundtrack the Olympics and win the custom of Johnny Sports-fan. Now cynics like me will snigger & grin widely at the irony of attempting to pimp the whore London by listing it's STD's, but, seriously, did whoever chose this ever listen to the lyrics? Reminds me of when the BBC gormlessly decided to hawk itself by hiring an embarrasment of slebs to grunt along to Lou Reed's smack anthem 'Perfect Day', seemingly on the basis of the title alone (though also possibly cos most at the time knew it from the Trainspotting soundtrack, which, presumably in the BBC hive mind, made it keeeewl, but ought to have given them a pretty big clue as to it's subject matter - whoops). Mind you, the perennially deluded and ignorant glut of middle Englander dipshits & knee jerk nationalists that will doubtless fill our pubs with their charming, virtually wordless renditions of this punk anfum in the next year have ever behaved thus. You've seen this sort of eminently slapable twat waving their little flags and belting out 'Jerusalem' at the Proms for about a century now - the last few embers of empire still just about glowing in their dead, dead eyes - and you just know they are completely unaware of the fact that it's a piss take. 'And did those feet / in ancient times / walk upon England's mountains green?' asks William Blake, rhetorically. The answer is: of course they fucking didn't. Jesus did not go on holiday to Cornwall, just as Lou Reed did not write a song about how he had a nice time with a girl on Tuesday. And I don't imagine Joe Strummer ever lay back and dreamt of a day when he could take satisfaction in soundtracking the pissing away of billions of public pounds on a glorified sports day.
If you're a sports fan, get ready to continue enjoying the war on art you've been conducting since launching your playground 'Wedgies For Weirdos' campaign. If you are or were a Clash fan, get ready to enjoy the experience of coming to loathe one of your favourite songs. Increasingly, I hope the Mayans were right about next year.
In summary: Facepalm
Yacht - Shangri La
McCartney II Re-issue
Good news! The best Beatle re-issues the best Beatle solo album in June. McCartney II is chock full of some of the best music EVER, including proto-techno classic Temporary Secretary. Out of press for some years now, it's being re-issued in a predictably multi-formatted way, but there is one reason why you should go out and the 3 disc über-collectors edition, and that's the amazing full length version of 'Check My Machine' - an oddball slice of sci-fi reggae funk that Macca knocked out in order to, well, check a new machine he'd bought. If off-the-cuff demos sounded this good today, we'd all be living in a happier world.
FNORD - 23 minute live mix from Zarcorp HQ
If you fancy a boogie this weekend, may we humbly recommend this 23 minute chunk of fun we mixed up live at our secret bunker HQ (which can be found - if you're looking, which you shouldn't be - slightly to the left of reality, underneath the fat turtle with red eyebrows, third buzzer down, ask for Emperor Norton). Enjoy & share!
FNORD - Live Club Set From ZHQ (extract) - Feb 2011 by Zarcorp Inc.
FNORD - Live Club Set From ZHQ (extract) - Feb 2011 by Zarcorp Inc.
Blackout 0
16th June sees the first Blackout event, presented by Eat Your own Ears & Harrier and Zinnerwell, AKA Sam Potter, of Late Of The Pier. An event unlike any other, Blackout will see audiences immersed in darkness, both literally and figuratively. Unannounced line ups of excellent musicians will play in the pitch black - it's a blind waltz between their music and your ears. The first opportunity to immerse yourself in this sea of sound comes on June 16th, tickets are available soon @ £12.50. Watch THIS SPACE....
Arveene & Misk feat. Aaron Smyth - Love Money Music Body
Have a listen to the new track from FNORD favourites and purveyors of excellent club music, Arveene & Misk. An insidious mix of deep vocal tech-house, laced with broody, vaguely eastern strings that gradually develops into a proper heads-down acid squelcher. Remixes are ace too, with re-works from Evil 9, In Flagranti and Polymath.
It's out May 11th on MoFoHiFi.
LOVE MONEY MUSIC BODY by arveeneandmisk
It's out May 11th on MoFoHiFi.
LOVE MONEY MUSIC BODY by arveeneandmisk
Gablé - Brick Trick
Who Made Who - Every Minute Alone
Brilliant new track from the never disappointing Who Made Who:
WhoMadeWho - Every Minute Alone from Kompakt Records on Vimeo.
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