Gesaffelstein - Viol

More excellent tech-noir from the Turbo Recordings man, from his new EP 'Conspiracy Vol.2' - which is out now, - get it here!

Punk + Olympics = Fuck the Fuck off, yer Fuckin Fuck Faced Fucks

"Lahndan corlling ner nee ner nee ner ner....um...battle....something....er..la la la la la la .... hang on...Ice age...er....hey here we go! This is the bit I like!...I LIVE BY THE RIVVVVVAAAHH! COME ON BRITAIN! YEAAAAAHHHHH! UK! UK! UK!..."

- as performed by Terry Tosspot, 23 yrs, on July 27th 2012, outside the Steroid & Shoespike sportsbar, (formerly the Millenium Arms public house) Soho, London, Hell.


So 'London Calling' in all it's paranoid glory has been chosen to soundtrack the Olympics and win the custom of Johnny Sports-fan. Now cynics like me will snigger & grin widely at the irony of attempting to pimp the whore London by listing it's STD's, but, seriously, did whoever chose this ever listen to the lyrics? Reminds me of when the BBC gormlessly decided to hawk itself by hiring an embarrasment of slebs to grunt along to Lou Reed's smack anthem 'Perfect Day', seemingly on the basis of the title alone (though also possibly cos most at the time knew it from the Trainspotting soundtrack, which, presumably in the BBC hive mind, made it keeeewl, but ought to have given them a pretty big clue as to it's subject matter - whoops). Mind you, the perennially deluded and ignorant glut of middle Englander dipshits & knee jerk nationalists that will doubtless fill our pubs with their charming, virtually wordless renditions of this punk anfum in the next year have ever behaved thus. You've seen this sort of eminently slapable twat waving their little flags and belting out 'Jerusalem' at the Proms for about a century now - the last few embers of empire still just about glowing in their dead, dead eyes - and you just know they are completely unaware of the fact that it's a piss take. 'And did those feet / in ancient times / walk upon England's mountains green?' asks William Blake, rhetorically. The answer is: of course they fucking didn't. Jesus did not go on holiday to Cornwall, just as Lou Reed did not write a song about how he had a nice time with a girl on Tuesday. And I don't imagine Joe Strummer ever lay back and dreamt of a day when he could take satisfaction in soundtracking the pissing away of billions of public pounds on a glorified sports day.
If you're a sports fan, get ready to continue enjoying the war on art you've been conducting since launching your playground 'Wedgies For Weirdos' campaign. If you are or were a Clash fan, get ready to enjoy the experience of coming to loathe one of your favourite songs. Increasingly, I hope the Mayans were right about next year.

In summary: Facepalm

Yacht - Shangri La

Hooray! New Yorkers Yacht have are streaming their new album 'Shangri La' HERE. It's an excellent record and arrives on DFA at the cusp of summer, when sounds like this are most definitely needed. You can also grab a free download of 'Dystopia (The Earth Is On Fire)'from their website, HERE.

Electro Skansen - Bitch Please

If you go down to the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise...

McCartney II Re-issue

Good news! The best Beatle re-issues the best Beatle solo album in June. McCartney II is chock full of some of the best music EVER, including proto-techno classic Temporary Secretary. Out of press for some years now, it's being re-issued in a predictably multi-formatted way, but there is one reason why you should go out and the 3 disc über-collectors edition, and that's the amazing full length version of 'Check My Machine' - an oddball slice of sci-fi reggae funk that Macca knocked out in order to, well, check a new machine he'd bought. If off-the-cuff demos sounded this good today, we'd all be living in a happier world.


FNORD - 23 minute live mix from Zarcorp HQ

If you fancy a boogie this weekend, may we humbly recommend this 23 minute chunk of fun we mixed up live at our secret bunker HQ (which can be found - if you're looking, which you shouldn't be - slightly to the left of reality, underneath the fat turtle with red eyebrows, third buzzer down, ask for Emperor Norton). Enjoy & share!


FNORD - Live Club Set From ZHQ (extract) - Feb 2011 by Zarcorp Inc.

Blackout 0

16th June sees the first Blackout event, presented by Eat Your own Ears & Harrier and Zinnerwell, AKA Sam Potter, of Late Of The Pier. An event unlike any other, Blackout will see audiences immersed in darkness, both literally and figuratively. Unannounced line ups of excellent musicians will play in the pitch black - it's a blind waltz between their music and your ears. The first opportunity to immerse yourself in this sea of sound comes on June 16th, tickets are available soon @ £12.50. Watch THIS SPACE....

Arveene & Misk feat. Aaron Smyth - Love Money Music Body

Have a listen to the new track from FNORD favourites and purveyors of excellent club music, Arveene & Misk. An insidious mix of deep vocal tech-house, laced with broody, vaguely eastern strings that gradually develops into a proper heads-down acid squelcher. Remixes are ace too, with re-works from Evil 9, In Flagranti and Polymath.

It's out May 11th on MoFoHiFi.



LOVE MONEY MUSIC BODY by arveeneandmisk

Gablé - Brick Trick

Dummy have posted a download from the most welcome Frenchmen to enter our ears in a long temps. 'Brick Trick' by Gablé is the oddest minute and a half that you'll feel compelled to listen to on repeat this year.
Click, and head over to Dummy to grab it!

Mai - 'Our Ghosts'

Just belatedly stumbled across this wonderful song from Paris based Swede Mai. Our Ghosts is the perfect song to start a spring day and can be heard by clicking the song name, right there at the beginning of this sentence.

Winning Zef

Ok. Open up a new tab in your chuckle browser and enable humour cookies.

First up it's Mr. Charlie Sheen. Whatever you make of his recent descent into madness / ascent to comedic glory watch this, and keep a phone handy so you can call an ambulance when you begin to asphyxiate from laughing too hard.



Secondly - more next level shit for your PC Computer from South Africa. FNORD favourites Die Antwoord have made a film with Harmony Korine, or vice-versa if you prefer. It's kind of what would happen in an alternate universe if an Afrikaans Mike Leigh made a film whilst under the gentle influence of some weak LSD.
Their jokes and ours aside, this is a genuinely brilliant film in many ways. Watch and enjoy.

Rói Höttur - Imaginarium

We all know that your environment will shape your music more than anything. If you're living a scummy, scratchy inner city life of rectangles then you're going to route a drumbox through an overdrive and scream. When your back garden looks like this:
I guess you can't help making an awesome psychedelic rock album.
Rói Höttur are five swedes who live pretty much at the top of the world, inbetween a mountain, some trees & the period 1967-1976. They've just self-released their debut album 'Imaginarium' - a gorgeous, brooding bubble of riffs, whooshes, bleeps, yelps and yearning blues rock, smothered in heartfelt, fuzzy vibes.
A slight detachment from the rest of the world obviously does you wonders when it comes to putting together an unashamedly retro long player. And make no mistakes, this is definitely a long player. Not an album, a set, or mere collection of songs. This is one you need to sit down and take time with, start to finish.
Their influences may be obvious (Pink Floyd, late period Doors, the more whacked out end of Zeppelin, a smidgeon of Nick Cave on the vocals and a dab of Zappa weirdness) but they're mined with love and enthusiasm. For example, it doesn't really matter that the end of 'Dream Of Papaver (Reprise)' is essentially 'Great Gig In The Sky', because it's honestly the only way it could have gone.
These tracks stretch out like the Scandinavian landscape (scandscape?) - beautiful, immense, wide, open. But the essential character of the record lies in it's unexpected warmth. It's the aural equivalent of the fire you light so you can sit down in the freezing cold and take in that vastness without freezing your Nordic balls off. It's a hug and a blanket on your shoulders. It's your friends face glowing in the flame as she points at a distant peak. It's the glow of the homestead amidst the howl of the wolves. It's the sound of no-one else around for miles and miles, and it luxuriates in its isolation. 
Here it is in it's entirety for you to listen to, and we recommend that you do so - "We want the world to have it!", said bassist Volter Hagman, when we asked if it could be shared. Ah! not only talented but generous too. Tack så mycket, Rói Höttur, du är underbar!
Imaginarium by Rói Höttur

Yuck - Holing Out

Looking forward to the Yuck album, and here's a nice new vid for the harmonic, fuzzy 'Holing Out' taken from said debut.


Yuck-"Holing Out" Music Video from VIDEOTHING.COM on Vimeo.

What's on NASA's S.T.E.R.E.O? The Sun!

No, we're not talking an astronauts iPod dock, we're talking Solar Terrestrial Relations Observatory (or S.Te.Re.O) - two satellites now in orbit around our star with the purposes of getting a full 360 of the roasting ball of fire for the first time and sussing out whether or not it does indeed have it's hat on, and if it will be coming out to play. And by 'coming out to play' they mean flinging out coronal mass ejections that mess with all our funky electrics, knock satellites out of action or burn the planet to death. In celebration of another milestone in humanity's space adventures, here's some prog:

It's Time To Get Away : LCD Soundsystem announce last ever show :(

Goddamit, first the White Stripes decide it's time to bugger off, and now the most influential and groovy band of the last decade (not to mention one of the best live acts EVER) are leaving us for the history books. LCD will bow out with a show in Madison Square Gardens, require all to attend dressed in white and/or black, and will be playing for 3 hours with support from a whole host of DFA associates. So at least it's going to be a proper send off. Details here on the DFA site.

If anyone wants to fly us to NYC for April 2nd, that would be great, thanks.

Shrag - Ghosts Before Breakfast

Where It's At Is Where You Are offer up their February singles club download in the form of an excellent 3-track fuzz 'n' beat indie punk -out from Brighton's Shrag.
Lead track 'Ghosts Before Breakfast' Sounds a lot like Love Is All attempting The Rapture's 'Out Of The Races And On To The Tracks', and is a definite winner.

Download the full 3-track E.P here.

Limp Bizkit (almost) Officially Shit

Maybe you live in Austin, Texas. Maybe you don't.
Either way, you absolutely should get involved with helping their 'Solid Waste Service Department' (ie. poo processing plant) choose its new name. Why? Because they're letting an internet vote decide it, and the current top suggestion and leader by several thousand votes is the epic:


FRED DURST SOCIETY OF THE HUMANITIES AND ARTS

Fuck. Yes. That's right.

Please, for the love of various gods:

VOTE!

So Long And Thanks For All The Blues

The White Stripes have split up. Not sure what else can be said about that.

DURRR with Blondes (live), Rory Phillips, The Lovely Jonjo, FNORD & Stopmakingme














Aye, it's DURRR time again and we'll be DJing along with Rory Phillips, The Lovely Jonjo, & Stopmakingme at XOYO. Live entertainment in the form of Blondes. Obviously, you're coming, so see you there! Facebook event is here.

Siriusmo - Feromonikon / Signal

Having made what was easily our favourite electronic tune of 2010, the magnificent 'Einmal In Der Woche Schreien', Siriusmo greets 2011 with a hypnotic electro club track that keeps threatening to go all spacey, but never really does, instead finding itself falling repeatedly through the filters and bleeps that one might hear if R2D2 discovered a vocoder and a drumbox and used them to try and get a contract with Ed Bangers and Kitsune at once. The AA side 'Signal' is like the theme from an 80's BBC Schools programme - albeit one about some mad unit of disco soldiers who do like a nice march now and then but often find it too rigid, preferring to just chill out to some lounge house. Out now on Monkeytown.

  Siriusmo - Feromonikon by thesubs-blog

Chilly Gonzales - "You Can Dance'"

Bum-tastic, bosom jiggling, Chilly slapping video for the Entertainist's latest 80's-workout-disco-esque single.